We have been married for 15 years this year, and have 2 daughters, aged 6 and 8 years old. At the end of last year I was promoted at work, and put onto the Associate Attorney program, which I was utterly delighted with. My husband told me how proud he was of me and made me feel really supported. The course was known to be really intense, with 10 – 12 hour days being common, and because my husband would be working night shifts and weekends, we both decided that we would need extra help when it came to the day to day cooking, cleaning, and general caring for the children.
The obvious solution was to get an Au Pair. We had the extra space at home for a live in position, and with my new promotion we could more than afford it. So, we looked around, checked references, and decided upon a nice young girl with good experience, aged 25. She started with us a month later, in the January of 2016. She seemed to fit in with our family brilliantly, getting along with the girls as if she were a big sister, and being a lifesaver to us keeping everything in check.
Everything seemed to be going swimmingly. My husband and I weren’t seeing much of each other at all, but it wouldn’t be forever, and the extra money was the incentive to keep going. A few months in, around March time, I did begin to feel a funny jealousy toward my husband and how he was interacting with our Au Pair. Of course she was younger than me, a very pretty girl, tall and slender, but I felt it was more than that. I decided to tell him how I felt and he dismissed me as being silly, he loved me, and saw her like just another daughter in the house.
Fast forward to the first week in May, and I had seen my husband detach from me greatly, I could just tell that something was wrong. We hadn’t been able to spend any proper time together for months due to work schedules, and it was him that actually suggested we make a date night for him to take me to dinner. The thought of it felt really nice, to get dressed up and know it would just be the two of us spending some romantic quality time together. I was really excited.
I managed to get away from work two hours early on the evening we planned to go out, and as I got out of my car to go into the house I looked forward to a long soak in the bath and a glass of wine while I got myself ready. I could hear the TV on quite loud, and as I popped my head into the lounge I saw the children immersed in a movie. Feeling glad to be home I headed up stairs, looking forward to stripping off and heading into our en suite. I didn’t call out, I just walked into our bedroom, and straight in front of me was – my husband and our Au pair in bed together!
I could not quite believe it, I just stared at them trying to take it all in, before turning on my heels and running through the house, into the back garden, gasping for air as I felt the wind being kicked out of me. My husband appeared behind me, trying to apologize and saying how he was going to tell me, it wasn’t planned, and so on. But it was just all noise to me, I felt numb.
I went to sleep in the spare room that night, and in the morning life carried on as normal. This is all so recent, I really don’t know how to be dealing with the betrayal, especially as I have work commitments, and I do really need the Au Pair right now, who the children happen to adore. I am really hurt, my heart is literally breaking inside, but the only way I can cope right now is by carrying on. I am still sleeping in the spare room, and the Au Pair in hers, and my husband in the marital bedroom. I know in my heart that they have fallen for each other, but I don’t feel I can face the reality of actually losing him forever. This may sound like a cliche story, but it happened to me, another woman was there for my husband when I wasn’t.